Last Goodbye

"I know I was doing the right decision. But where does that brought me?

I am here inside the bus going to Manila. Looking at the outside world, I can’t help but reminisce of all the moments that Robert and I shared. Looking back, those were the happiest moments of my life. Those shared kisses, embrace and all the times that we’re together. Together we dream dreams and cry and laugh our hearts out, and fight. Yes, we fight ever so often, but we always end up kissing and making up for it – literally and figuratively.

Those were the days. Days that were, but only memories now. No more movies to watch together. No more dreams to dream and fulfill together. No more of those long hours of talking or simply sharing each others’ souls. No more Robert. No more Dannie and Robert.

I did not only lose a boyfriend. I lost my bestfriend as well. He was always there for me. When I needed someone to listen to my problems, even how petty they are… when I needed someone to lift up my spirits when I’m feeling down… when I needed someone to laugh at my self – made corny jokes… when I wanted a hug… when I am in need of a compatriot in times I feel like the world’s against me…when I need someone to tell me to hang on when I almost give up…

I still love him. I can’t deny that. Nor that I could take that away from myself. I will surely miss that bastard. As I do now.

As the bus started it’s way en-route Manila, I steadied myself in the window seat. It will be any moment now.

The bus slowly approached his place. From afar I could see his silhouetted physique in his place’s balcony. I hope he won’t see me. But I really wanted to see him – even for the last time.

He did saw me! It’s so foolish of me to take that seat.

Our eyes met, and I can honestly say he said those three words I haven’t heard for a long time, and probably will be hearing for the last time.

I did not exactly hear the words, but I saw his lips forming those syllables I had been so accustomed to. I looked at him, but this time with all my emotions suppressed inside I hope my eyes could all say.

A nanosecond of eye – contact is enough; I could not take it anymore! I looked the opposite way.

…And cried my way home."

to be concluded...